Every year, corporations across America invest in lavish holiday parties, giving their employees an opportunity to humiliate themselves personally rather than professionally.
Our firm's party was yesterday evening, and oh, what interesting things there were to see. Besides looking out for women desperately seeking the prom queen title at a cocktail attire event, there were plenty of plunging necklines, fat rolls, and scandalous dance-floor pairs.
(Edited to protect the careers of the innocent)
I had two great moments at the party (both of them distressingly sober). The first was when [a person] placed his hand on my lower back; the shock made me inhale a piece of quiche which almost completely blocked my windpipe. I had to struggle to retain my composure and regular breathing - and all with a smile.
The second, however, was not only the best holiday party moment but also winner of Freudian Slip of the Year 2005. A young colleague turned to me and said, "Shall we get a room.....uh, I mean shall we get a table?"
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"Hey! That's my table!" -UERFW
ReplyDeleteHow perfect that you nearly choked on French food!
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